It's raining, It's pouring, It's thunder storming....
January 1st, 2022 was the date I was given to let go of my previous business name and rebrand...I was devastated. When I had attempted to finally trademark my business name, I found out another business had just beat me to the punch and I was given a cease and desist letter (meaning you need to pull the plug on everything). I felt a lot of things, regret for not having trademarked sooner, embarrassed about the reason I would need to rebrand and deeply sad that I had to pivot away from a name I held close to my heart. I wondered several times if I should just call it a wrap, be thankful for the 5 year run my business had and move on to something else. But I decided to stick it out and commit to the rebrand. I was 5 months pregnant at the time with our second child (my little pumpkin), so it was a bit of a juggling act to focus and complete the rebrand while being pregnant, chasing around a toddler and overall just trying to stay encouraged.
May 8th, 2022 (Mother's Day) our little pumpkin was born! I've had a couple miscarriages in the past, so making it to this day filled me with great job but also great relief. All was well as we spent those sleepless nights back in newborn mode while also learning what it felt like to be a family of 4. One week later, our baby girl spiked a fever and was admitted to the children's hospital. We were there for 6 days...filled with uncertainty (as the doctor's couldn't find the cause of her fever) and with broken hearts as our 1 week old had to undergo major tests, pricks and pokes and all the tubes. We were emotionally exhausted. When I was still pregnant we had gotten a double stroller as a gift and I hadn't gotten a chance to use it yet. I remember telling my husband that all I wanted to do, was go home and take my two babies for a walk in our double stroller. Thankfully by day 6 her fever had resolved, and though we never found out the cause, we were glad to go home.
June 17th, 2022 my dad passed away. It was my brother and my husbands birthday coincidentally as well. I was able to see my dad the night before he passed. He had been in and out of the hospital for awhile, so I went to visit him but certainly didn't think it would be for the last time. This was it, the point at which I was utterly and completely done. Have you ever felt like the wind was just knocked out of you? That every emotional and mental fiber you had was drained? I was so emotionally drained, I almost felt numb. This was the point when I thought to myself, I just don't know if I can do this...I don't know how to do this. I didn't know how I could possibly make it through another one of life's blows and punches. I prayed, tried to recall scripture for encouragement, and that's all I felt I could do.
I had to believe that things would be okay, more importantly, that I would be okay. I thought back to all of the impossibly difficult situations that I experienced over the years, that seemed hopeless at the time but somehow turned out okay. I tried to remember who it was that gave me strength, and tried to remember that I'm never alone. It's a daily process, but my endeavor is to do exactly that- just take it day by day.
The Songs:
The Pictures:
My hope for you:
No matter what obstacle you may be facing, my hope for you is that you won't give up. Take a moment to recall all that you've done, accomplished, triumphed, and healed from...whatever the obstacle is now, it's no different. Simply begin by believing you can.